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_92.webp "A married man says he became “obsessed” with another woman after meeting her at a course - but his wife has since forgiven him after realising it “wasn’t his fault”.<br/><br/>Ruth Perl, 58, and her husband David, 64, have spent 13 years recovering from the incident.<br/><br/>David never acted on his feelings towards the person he fancied - but he chose to tell the woman after confiding in Ruth.<br/><br/>He started researching an emotional experience known as ‘limerence’ - which means intrusive, romantic thoughts about another person. <br/><br/>David realised his feelings were unwanted - he had no control over them and wasn't interested in beginning an affair with the woman. <br/><br/>After telling Ruth about his realisation, the couple spent time rebuilding their relationship - and say they’re happier than ever.<br/><br/>David, a couples’ therapist from St. Albans, Herts., said: “It wasn’t a normal crush, it was weird and disturbing - but we’ve put in the years to heal ourselves since.<br/><br/>“It was a difficult one - I did end up telling the other person, as I was encouraged to do so through therapy.<br/><br/>“I think she was horrified - in hindsight, it was really unfair to put that on her.<br/><br/>“But it’s all about forgiveness, we’ve done the work and are happier than ever.”<br/><br/>David met the woman he developed feelings for on January 14, 2011 - after chatting to her at a training course.<br/><br/>Their conversation lasted less than 20 minutes, but David could feel he was “besotted” by her - without being able to put a finger on why.<br/><br/>“I’ve had crushes before,” he added. “We both have. But nothing like this - this was really unusual.”<br/><br/>David thought about her, night-and-day, for weeks.<br/><br/>He looked online at forums about “obsessive love” - and came across a post about limerence.<br/><br/>He said: “I thought, 'jeez, this is what I’ve got to a T.'<br/><br/>“Something’s not right - I was absolutely obsessed and I only spoke to her for 20 minutes.<br/><br/>“I kept going over every single word she said to me, every little action.<br/><br/>“The moment I’d wake up, I’d rehearse in my head what I might say to her if she came up to talk to me.<br/><br/>“I’d experience soaring highs if she replied to an email - and extreme lows if she didn’t.<br/><br/>“It was like an intermittent reward.”<br/><br/>Knowing the feeling wasn’t going to go away any time soon, he decided to tell Ruth - who also works as a couples’ therapist.<br/><br/>She said: “David told me, and this was all going on about five days after my dad’s funeral.<br/><br/>“I was in horrific grief at the time, and so my first thoughts were: ‘Oh, for god’s sake. How can you be so bloody stupid?’<br/><br/>“My dad had just died, and my husband wanted to p*ss off into fantasy land.<br/><br/>“We went into freefall, and it was a very, very difficult 12 months.”<br/><br/>After choosing to concentrate on grieving for her dad for a year, Ruth says she “finally had the brain capacity” to sit down with David, and ask him what was going on.<br/><br/>He hadn’t acted on his feelings - and actively decided he wouldn’t “consummate” the crush.<br/><br/>“David reached out to me,” Ruth said. “He asked me, ‘please help me understand what’s going on.’<br/><br/>“He was so confused. I asked him if he still wanted to be married, and he said, ‘I don’t want to throw away what we’ve got.’<br/><br/>“I told him to sit in the confusion, and I’d do what I could to support him.<br/><br/>“But I knew that what will be will be, we might not necessarily make it out of this.”<br/><br/>David said: “We started having marriage counselling - and one thing I want to stress is it isn’t an excuse to cheat.<br/><br/>“I was responsible for what I did - but it did make me realise that often, people don’t set out to have an affair.”<br/><br/>David explored some of the ways therapists encourage people to “heal” from limerence - including starving themselves from contact, or consummating it with the other person.<br/><br/>He settled on going to therapy, and letting the woman know he couldn’t speak to her anymore.<br/><br/>Now, David and Ruth help other couples going through the same thing - and have taught their children, Hannah-Mai, 32, and Isobel, 29, how to value their own relationships.<br/><br/>Ruth said: “It was important our two daughters knew about all this.<br/><br/>“They were older teenagers when this was all going on, and they understood it.<br/><br/>“We thought it was very important for them to understand that all marriages have differences - but you don’t throw the towel in when the going gets tough.<br/><br/>“Even when you’re talking about a full-blown physical affair. Once is a mistake, twice is a habit.”")
_the-smiths-never-had-no-one-ever-official-audio.webp "The Smiths")
_if-i-had-no-loot.webp "Tony! Toni! Toné!")
_jerome-powell-has-had-it-with-the-1970s-talk-saying-he-doesnt-see-the-stag-or-the-flation-investors-are-worried-about.webp "After three hot inflation reports to start the year and some disturbing signs of persistent price pressures in the first-quarter GDP report, some investors have begun to fear the U.S. could be headed for a repeat of the stagflationary 1970s.")
_he-had-no-idea-i-was-a-secret-agent.webp "MSA previously My Story Animated")
_no-eye-had-seen.webp "Michael W. Smith")
_eamonn-holmes-reveals-he-had-sexual-chemistry-with-victoria-smurfit-who-is-she.webp "Eamonn Holmes reveals he had ‘sexual chemistry’ with Victoria Smurfit: Who is she? from no i had")
_tony-toni-ton-if-i-had-no-loot.webp "koollatter")
_no-eye-had-seen-all-is-well.webp "Steve Green - Topic")
_car-is-pulled-off-the-tracks-after-being-crushed-by-train-at-crossing.webp "Footage shows the moment a car was pulled off the tracks after being crushed by a train at a crossing. <br/><br/>The black Suzuki SUV was removed after it was hit by the 0908 train from Saltburn to Nunthorpe, near Redcar Central station, on May 1. <br/><br/>The crumpled bonnet of the car can be seen barely hanging on – with the front bumper dragging along the ground. <br/><br/>Network Rail staff were on scene to clear the area.<br/><br/>Passerby Stanley Binns, 75 - who captured the footage - said: “I took the video from the top of a supermarket car park which overlooks the crossing. <br/><br/>“The accident had already happened, people told me it happened about an hour before. <br/><br/>“They reckoned the crossing light wasn’t working and the driver drove on and the train hit the side of it. <br/><br/>“When I got there you could see the end of the train sticking out.” <br/><br/>Karen Duffy, Operations Director for Network Rail's North & East route, said: \")
_if-among-us-had-no-chat.webp "Shiloh u0026 Bros")
_i-had-no-idea-shein-sold-pc-parts.webp "Linus Tech Tips")
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